People Who Clearly Woke Up On The Wrong Side Of The Bed

humor | 5/8/18

These people went to sleep a little too late or woke up a little too early. Now they’re out in the world living life and making mistakes. Sometimes it’s just too early to make good decisions. Sit back, relax, grab a hefty dose of caffeine, and be thankful that you didn’t leave your house wearing two left shoes.

Keep reading for all the ways not to wear shoes, how not to iron, and the worst thing to do with a bottle of pink paint.

Starting Off On The Wrong Foot

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Photo Credit: @louisyogapants / Instagram

The first thing you learn about putting on shoes is that your feet are supposed to go inside them. I don’t know how this even happens.

How can you fully tie up your laces and not realize that you’ve left your toes exposed? At least this person is sporting some fashionable socks.

Morning Mix Up

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Photo Credit: pickles_on_reddit / Reddit

In his tired state, this poor guy put some cortisone on his toothbrush instead of Colgate. To be fair, these two tubes look way too similar.

It’s probably not the best idea to keep them so close together. How about you move the cortisone to another room… or another house… or another galaxy.

It’s Going Down. We’re Yelling Timber.

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Photo Credit: Hansssssolo / Reddit

I don’t care what time it is. Even four in the afternoon would be too early in the morning for this disaster.

I’d just walk out the door and find somewhere else to live for a while. Keep reading for a guy who found out what old makeup tastes like.

Driving In A Winter Wonderland

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Photo Credit:Bp0tt3r / Reddit

This is what happens when you forget to roll up your car window before a snow storm. People, always roll up your car windows. Even if you live in a place where it never snows. Better safe than very very sorry.

Hopefully, this guy was able to vacuum all the snow out before it melted.

Nope, That’s Soap

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Photo Credit: ChristianComa / Reddit

Someone was either very confused, or a child learned what naughty words are not appropriate to say at a soap store.

To be fair, it does look like a delicious watermelon. I’d be inclined to take a bite too if it wasn’t clearly green and red soap.

Spill The Tea

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Photo Credit: @NimffMcManus / Twitter

Now I really want a delicious cup of tea. I also never want to find out what old foundation steeping in hot water tastes like.

Serves him right for sipping on a cup of something that wasn’t made for him. Does this guy just drink from any mug in his line of sight? Keep reading for the worst thing that could happen to a pizza.

Too Tired To Function

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Photo Credit: @kalesalad / Instagram

Being too matchy-matchy is a serious fashion faux pas. This little kid can’t face the world knowing that his outfit is all one color.

It’s better to lie face down on the ground and roll around in your own drama fit. Somebody get this kid a purple coat.

That Was… Not Easy

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Photo Credit: Jar_Lar / Reddit

Shopping at Staples is supposed to be a breeze. Their whole ad campaign is about how easy it is to buy office supplies.

Except for when you need to buy staples and literally every product has the word “Staples” on it. Sorry, paperclips, you’re not needed here.

When The Moon Hits Your Eye Like A Big Pizza Pie

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Photo Credit: @JamesAALongman / Twitter

Let’s set the scene. It’s 8 AM, you walk on the subway and see this lady, asleep, with a very sad pizza sort of in her hand, but also sort of on the floor.

Only a tiny part of the pizza is actually touching the floor. I bet she’ll still eat it. Keep reading for a bag of marshmallows that suffered a worse fate than this pizza.

Do Not Drink

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Photo Credit: randomhero98 / Reddit

I know this is more of a design flaw than anything else, but how many tired people bought one of these and tried to chug it before the store was forced to put up that sign?

Maybe in the future, we’ll all be car-people hybrids, and we’ll be able to drink those “energy shots.”

Time To Find A New Major

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Photo Credit: kalesalad / Reddit

It is much too early in the morning for this guy to focus on physics. Forget differential equations, how about a differential career path?

All of the vectors are telling him that the food service industry may be a better fit than engineering. You never have to figure out the differential equation of a double cheeseburger.

How Does This Happen?

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Photo Credit: @goth_cakes / Twitter

This picture makes me feel both hungry and disgusted. Who eats strawberry marshmallows?

Also, who irons strawberry marshmallows? Were they mistaken for a puffy coat or was somebody just trying (and failing) to make indoor s’mores? Keep reading for another iron mishap that isn’t quite as sticky.

She’s Got A Ticket To Ride

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Photo Credit: @_aimeeconnolly / Twitter

Tfw you accidentally print your boarding pass on A1 paper. At least the ticket is big enough to cover her whole embarrassed face.

Maybe she’s getting on a very big plane and going to a very big country with giant people. That’s a big ticket item if I ever saw one.

Two Left Feet

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Photo Credit: mbop / Reddit

What are thooosse! Seriously, though, those shoes look like they belong on a teddy bear who’s going back to school.

They even have different color laces so you know which is left and which is right, which obviously didn’t help this guy. How does it feel now that the shoe is on the other foot?

Iron Out The Kinks

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Photo Credit: tonyalex8 / Imgur

The bad news: this guy ruined a perfectly good carpet. The good news: his iron is now stylish af.

Pro tip: never leave your heated iron on fabric if you’re not actively moving it around. Irons are like sharks— if they stop moving, they burn a hole through your whole life.

Tired As A Dog

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Photo Credit: Thaimae / Reddit

This dog was extremely tired, but he just had to follow his owner into the bathroom in the middle of the night.

Friends don’t let friends poop alone. Yeah, he’s sleepy, but he’s a good boy, and that’s what counts. We really don’t deserve dogs.

Another Footwear Fail

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Photo Credit: lionrichie28 / Reddit

Your outfit communicates your inner persona to the rest of the world, and this outfit says “it’s Monday and I’m tired.”

It feels weird to wear the wrong shoe, right? How can you walk out the door without noticing? Maybe just own one pair of brown shoes so that this doesn’t happen again.

Red In The Face

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Photo Credit: @kalesalad / Instagram

This is false advertising. If a paint says that it easily washes off of skin, then there is no reason not to cover your whole face with it.

Time to break out the heavy duty makeup remover. If that doesn’t work, time to get a new face.

I Don’t Have Time For Your Mind Games, Starbucks

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Photo Credit: matdwyr / Reddit

Canadian law? Seems like Starbucks is trolling. This looks like the kind of activity that a robot would be very good at.

Are we trying to give free coffee to robots now? Because they’re already better than us. They don’t need caffeine. This isn’t school, Starbucks. Stop making us do math.

This Kid Got A Little Too Excited

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Photo Credit: philamignon / Reddit

I know, it’s early and you really want a Snickers bar for breakfast and all that’s standing between you and your dream is an inch thick sheet of plexiglass.

If you don’t have a wallet (because you’re four) your first thought is probably to climb in and grab a chocolate bar. Don’t do that. Bad idea.